Doctor Who Club of Australia

[montypython]

Welcome to my new thread, the place where I will be posting the fics I write based on the increasing amount of Doctor Who dreams I have (see my thread "Doctor Who Dreams"). I'm not sure how often I'll be posting, but I hope you enjoy when I do. Feel free to post comments, or your own fics if you wish (but they must be based on your dreams!).

And so, without any further ado, I give you my fic based on Dream #59.

The Good Dalek

Dalek Caan cautiously picked up a test tube with his plunger and poured the mixture into the bubbling beaker next to him.

“THE DOCTOR HASN’T SEEN THE LAST OF THE DALEKS YET!” he declared. “FOR MONTHS NOW I’VE BEEN TOILING, TRYING TO FIND A WAY FOR MY SPECIES TO SURVIVE. AND NOW AT LAST … I’VE FOUND THE ANSWER.” He looked at the solution before him, admiring his efforts.

“CREATING NEW DALEKS FAILED, MIXING DALEK AND HUMAN DNA FAILED … BUT WITH THIS FORMULA, NOTHING CAN POSSIBLY GO WRONG! I’VE BEEN STUDYING THE HABITS OF EARTH PLANTS THAT USE ASEXUAL REPRODUCTION TO SPREAD THEIR SEEDS, AND REALISED, WHY CAN’T I DO THE SAME? NOW FROM ME AND ME ALONE, A NEW GENERATION OF DALEKS SHALL EMERGE!” He pressed a button on his casing and it opened up, revealing the gruesome creature inside. He extended a tentacle and picked up the beaker.

“HERE’S TO THE SURVIVAL OF THE DALEKS!” he exclaimed, toasting to himself. He then took a deep breath and he drank.

“HMM, I DON’T FEEL ANY DIFFERENT,” he commented. “I’M STILL … WHOA!” For he had just noticed that he had just shed a tentacle. Slowly, but surely, the tentacle grew a body, more tentacles, and a big yellow eye.

“MY CHILD!” exclaimed Dalek Caan. “THE EXPERIMENT IS A SUCCESS!” The new Dalek flopped around uncomfortably. Dalek Caan hastily closed his outer casing.

“MY OFFSPRING MUST HAVE A CASING OF ITS OWN!” he said, gliding across the room. He then used his plunger to pull out a white casing with gold circles.

“COME, MY CHILD,” he said to the new Dalek. “ENTER YOUR NEW HOME!” The new Dalek wriggled across the floor and used its tentacles to push itself up into the casing.

“EXCELLENT,” said Dalek Caan. “NOW, WHO ARE YOU?”

“I AM A DALEK,” responded the new Dalek.

“CORRECT,” said Dalek Caan. “YOU SHALL BE NAMED … DALEK CAAN JUNIOR!”

“I AM DALEK CAAN JUNIOR,” said Dalek Caan Junior (DCJ from now on).

“AND WHAT IS THE INTENTION OF THE DALEKS?” asked Dalek Caan. DCJ didn’t respond.

“WHAT IS THE INTENTION OF THE DALEKS?” repeated Dalek Caan.

“WHATEVER THEY WANT. DALEKS HAVE FREE WILL,” replied DCJ.

“WHAT? NO!” cried Dalek Caan. “THE INTENTION OF THE DALEKS IS TO EXTERMINATE THE DOCTOR!”

“BUT THAT’S WRONG,” said DCJ. “KILLING IS WRONG.”

“WHAT?!” exclaimed Dalek Caan. “HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY…?”

“OO, WHAT’S THIS?” said DCJ, admiring his casing. “‘EMERGENCY TEMPORAL SHIFT’.”

“DON’T TOUCH THAT!” exclaimed Dalek Caan, but it was too late. DCJ vanished, and because Dalek Caan hadn’t programmed the coordinates for DCJ to match his own, he had no idea where he had gone. And the chance of finding him again were one in a million.

“I DON’T UNDERSTAND. WHAT HAPPENED?” Dalek Caan wondered.

“You should have done your research,” said a voice. Dalek Caan turned around, to see the Doctor and Martha facing him.

“DOCTOR!” he exclaimed. He went to shoot, but the laser went straight through the Doctor.

“You can’t hurt me,” said the Doctor. “Martha and I just had an encounter with an eccentric scientist. He gave us a formula to drink that rendered us pretty much like ghosts. It’ll wear off in a few hours, but in the meantime … we can’t be touched. But anyway, back to your little problem. You see Dalek Caan, you should know how reproduction works. Normally, you’ll inherit the main traits of your parents. And with asexual reproduction, you’ll be an exact clone of them. But because of the experimental method you used, that’s not what happened. Dalek Caan Junior inherited one teeny tiny insignificant gene that’s been tucked away since your species began, and it’s that gene that has formed the foundation of his existence. He took on a trait that’s been hidden in the Daleks’ genetic make-up since they were first created. A gene that you presumed to be gone. But it’s not. It’s just a minority in an environment of hatred, waiting to branch off and start its own life. And do you know what that gene is?” Dalek Caan didn’t reply. “Emotion. And a conscience. Dalek Caan Junior is his own being. He doesn’t know about the will of the Daleks or the intention of the Daleks. He just knows what he wants, and what is right and wrong.”

“OH NO!” exclaimed Dalek Caan. “I’VE CREATED A MONSTER! I MUST FIND HIM! EMERGENCY TEMPORAL SHIFT!” Dalek Caan vanished, and reappeared inside a toilet cubicle in Mexico. DCJ was nowhere to be seen.

“CRAP,” he said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Meanwhile, DCJ materialised in a small suburban street in Australia. He curiously started wandering around. He passed a number of houses, including one that looked remarkably like Ned Flanders’ house. He was eager to explore this new and exciting environment. As he glided down the street, 16-year-old Lauren Davis and her friend Holly Shepherd turned into the street.

“Oh my god,” said Lauren. “Was that a Dalek?”

“Where?” asked Holly, but DCJ had disappeared out of sight.

“Never mind,” said Lauren, and they kept walking. DCJ continued exploring, just enjoying being alive, when suddenly:

“Freeze!”

DCJ turned around to see a bunch of policemen pointing guns at him.

“You’re under arrest!” one of them said.

“BUT I HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING WRONG,” protested DCJ.

“Yeah right,” said one of the policemen. “We know all about the Daleks. They’re killing machines.” Two policemen came up to DCJ and dragged him away.

“NOOOOOOOOOO!” cried DCJ.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

DCJ was thrown into a dank, dark cell. He was surrounded by about a dozen other prisoners, including Lauren and Holly. They were all crammed into the one cell because the others were being fumigated.

“Hey,” Lauren said to DCJ. “You’re that Dalek I saw earlier tonight. What are you in for?”

“FOR BEING A DALEK,” said DCJ, sighing. “BUT I HAVEN’T EVEN DONE ANYTHING WRONG. APPARENTLY MY SPECIES ISN’T VERY HIGHLY THOUGHT OF, BUT I’M DIFFERENT.”

“Tough break,” said Holly.

“WHY ARE YOU HERE?” asked DCJ.

“Oh, Lauren shouted at a policeman after he said that Doctor Who was stupid,” explained Holly. “And I didn’t do anything to stop it.”

“WHAT’S DOCTOR WHO?” asked DCJ. But before Holly or Lauren could reply, one of the other prisoners stood up and took out a gun.

“Oh my god,” said Lauren. The guy pulled the trigger, and started shooting all around the cell.

“Quick, use your laser!” exclaimed Lauren.

“BUT I CAN’T,” said DCJ.

“Yes you can!” said Lauren. “You have to! You’re the only one who can save us!” DCJ looked around frantically. People were being shot, and he had the power to stop that. He nervously programmed his laser, and fired. Instantly the guy with the gun fell dead.

“You did it!” exclaimed Lauren. “You’re a hero!” The other prisoners started cheering, and inside, DCJ smiled, happy that the prejudice that had been put on him at first was now lifted.

The End

I changed and added a few things, just so it'd make sense. I hope you liked it

[Ickabod]

cool MP.....loved it

[montypython]

I've got a new one, based on dream #41. The thing is, are there restrictions for ratings on this forum? Read the summary for the dream and you'll see what I mean. I didn't want to post without checking first.

[Ickabod]

[montypython]

Unfortunately my stupid PM isn't working, so I'll just attach the link to the fic:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3716934/1/Death_Wish

[Ickabod]

Hey Monty....I got yr PM nic fic there

[montypython]

Okay I've got 2 fics going at the moment, both of which I'm almost finished. But I don't want to wait to post them, so I'll post the first part of one of them now. You'll receive the rest soon.

This is based on dream #35 (warning: DO NOT READ IF YOU LIKE MARTHA AND HATE ROSE!):

An Impossible Choice

1

The Doctor and Martha ran through the city, the enemy close on their trail. When the Doctor had materialised in London, he'd told Martha that they'd be out of there and having adventures again in no time. However, that had been before he'd run into an old alien enemy of his, the Demintorians. He'd fled straight away, but the Demintorians were catching up.

"What do we do if they catch us?" Martha asked as she struggled to keep up with the Doctor.

"You don't want to know," said the Doctor. "The Demintorians thrive on making people miserable. They make people make impossible decisions, just for fun. They're a truly evil race." They rounded a corner and headed down the footpath.

"I think we've lost them," Martha said. They continued to run as hard and fast as they could ... right into a group of Demintorians.

2

“Good morning Miss Tyler.”

“Good morning Norman,” said Rose as she made her way to her office at Torchwood. “How was your weekend?”

“Non-existent,” replied Norman. “I’ve been swamped. Our equipment has registered all these readings from … wait for it … an old disused basement, a few kilometres away from here.”

“What sort of readings?” asked Rose.

“They’re unlike anything I’ve ever seen before,” said Norman. “They’re emitting huge amounts of power. But what sort of power, I don’t know. It’s not electric, it’s not nuclear…”

“What’s in this basement?” questioned Rose.

“Well, nothing,” said Norman. “It seems to hold no purpose. I can only assume that it was once used, then whoever used it moved away, then no one bothered to fill it in. I visited it the other day, and this might seem odd, but it made me feel … weird. I don’t know how to explain it. It just got to me. I quickly installed a CCTV camera, and then I was off.”

“Show me footage from the camera,” said Rose. Norman nodded and led Rose to his office. He then pressed a few buttons on his computer, which brought up the image of the old basement.

“See, nothing,” he said. Rose observed the basement carefully. It was true, there was nothing in there. But maybe … she reached into her pocket and took out a pair of 3D glasses. Upon putting them on, she saw exactly what she wanted to see – a combination of multicoloured dots.

“Oh my god,” she breathed. She then looked down at her own hand, just to be sure. It was a perfect match. “Void stuff.”

“Er, what?” said Norman. Rose turned to him.

“Take me to this place,” she demanded. “Now.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Here we are,” said Norman. Rose looked around in bliss. She felt a tingling sensation all over her body. Her guess was that this basement contained a small hole in the universe. A hole someone covered in void stuff could, hopefully, fit through.

“Thanks Norm,” she said. “Now, are you clear on your instructions?”

“Tell your parents you’ve gone home, and register you as a missing person,” said Norman. “You can count on me.” Rose smiled and walked around the room. As she moved around, the tingling feeling came and went.

“There must be a specific point somewhere around here,” she murmured, randomly swiping her hand through the air.

“Aagh!” exclaimed Norman. “Miss Tyler, y-your hand …” Rose looked at her hand, well, the end of her arm. Her hand had vanished. As she reached further in, more of her arm disappeared.

“This is it,” she whispered. “Goodbye Norman. Thanks for everything.” And with that she turned, took a big step forward, and was gone.

3

The Doctor opened his eyes, to find to cold, yellow eyes of a Demintorian staring right back through the eye-holes of its long black cape.

“Hello Doctor,” it said in its husky voice. “You’ve changed a bit since we last met.” The Doctor shuddered at the memory. That was when a group of Demintorians had threatened to take away his supply of jelly babies if he didn’t do what they wanted. Luckily he’d outsmarted them then. But what did they want this time? He looked around his surroundings. He appeared to be in what looked like a basement. However, it was filled with Demintorian technology.

“Where’s Martha?” he asked.

“Ah yes, that girl you were with,” said the Demintorian. “My associates are keeping her company.”

“Just let her go!” cried the Doctor.

“But Doctor, that would ruin the point of this exercise,” the Demintorian said with a twinkle of evil in his eye. He then turned to the doorway. “Bring out the girl!” Two more Demintorians brought a terrified Martha into the room. She tried to struggle, but it was no use.

“Place her on the table,” directed the first Demintorian. Martha was put down on a table in the middle of the room, metal clasps securing themselves around her wrists and ankles. The first Demintorian then pressed a button on the side of the table, which activated a large laser to come down from the roof. The laser was aimed directly at Martha’s heart. Martha screamed.

“You can’t,” said the Doctor. “What’s she done to you?”

“But that’s the joy of being a Demintorian Doctor,” the Demintorian said. “To mentally torture people by giving them the hardest decisions that they'll ever make ... it's what we do for fun!”

“So what do I have to do for you to let Martha go?” asked the Doctor. He captured a glint of the Demintorian’s silver teeth, smiling beneath his cape.

“I’ll tell you what you have to do,” it said. “Our race has been observing you for a while now. We’ve watched you, but alas, we’ve never had the chance to capture you. During these observations, we noticed a companion of yours that you seemed to value very highly. A blonde girl.” The Doctor’s eyes widened.

“Ah, you know of whom I speak,” said the Demintorian. “It is obvious that this girl is no longer with you. If you want your current companion to live, this is what you must give us in return – your memories of the blonde girl.” The Doctor gaped. He knew the Demintorians were cruel, but to do this…

“Doctor, what are you waiting for!” yelled Martha. “Just do what they say!”

“But … Rose …” said the Doctor. “She … she …”

“She’s gone Doctor!” said Martha. The Doctor turned to face the Demintorian.

“This is an impossible choice,” he said. “Rose may be gone, but the only way I can keep her alive is in my memories. Whatever I decide, one of my companions will die.”

“And you must make a decision Doctor, otherwise we will wreak havoc on this world,” said the Demintorian. “You must decide which girl means more to you.” The Doctor turned from Martha to the Demintorian, frantically trying to make his decision.

“But could I allow myself to do it?” he said. “Could I take my memories of the girl that comforted me after the Time War, the girl that helped me to live again, the girl that I danced with … and just get rid of them?” He looked into Martha’s eyes. “But then again, could I make a decision to let someone I care for die?”

“Oi, what about the stuff I’ve done for you?” asked Martha irritably. But the Doctor wasn’t listening. He stared into space.

This is an impossible choice, he thought. And yet, the more his mind raced trying to think of a logical answer, the more he realised that this wasn’t something you could choose by weighing up the pros and cons. The decision had to be reached instinctively. And thought it hurt to admit it, as soon as the Demintorian had told him his choice, he’d known what he was going to do.

4

Rose looked around. She was still in the basement. Except … she was sure that she’d been standing at the other end before. She was also sure that last time she looked, it wasn’t filled with machines and computers …

“I made it,” she realised. But now what? Just because she was in this universe didn’t mean the Doctor was right in front of her. And was she even in the right universe? A feeling of dread came over her as she realised that she had no idea what she was doing. Just then she heard voices coming from behind the giant computer in front of her. She peeked over the edge, and gasped. It was the Doctor! He was being confronted by a large being in a black cape. As soon as she saw him she wanted nothing more than to jump into his arms and never let go. She went to call out to him, but stopped. She could see 2 more cloaked figures bringing out a young dark-skinned woman wearing a red leather jacket. She gaped as she realised what this meant.

Oh God, he’s gone and replaced me, she thought miserably. I’ve just become another Sarah Jane. But then again, when she thought about it she realised that the Doctor did need someone to hold his hand. She didn’t want him to be lonely, so if this girl made him happy, she supposed that was alright.

Still, she thought, that doesn’t mean he can’t have me too. She crouched quietly and listened to what the cloaked figures were saying.

“A blonde girl,” said the head figure. Rose may have missed the first part of the conversation, but she could guess who the creature was talking about. It then went on to say that the Doctor had to choose between his memories of Rose and the life of his current companion.

The poor guy, Rose thought. How can they force him to make that choice? While the Doctor thought about his decision, Rose looked on. Her first instinct had been to reveal herself to him, but as much as she loved him, she didn’t want to pressure him. But then again, what if he chose the other girl? Then if she did come out, he wouldn’t recognise her, and that would just be painful. She tried to weigh up what to do in her head.

I suppose if he loses his memories of me, I can always invite myself along and start over with him, she reasoned. It would definitely be hard, but she didn’t want anyone to die on account of her. Her experience meeting her real father had shown her what it was like to have that burden. And I suppose if he loved me once, he’ll love me again. But would he? Their relationship had been carefully forged over a bunch of deep, once-in-a-lifetime experiences. As the Doctor had told her, each decision we make creates a parallel universe. If he met her a second time, their relationship might be completely different. She put her head in her hands. This was not the decision a 20-year-old girl should have to make.

But then again, it’s not my decision, she realised. It’s the Doctor’s. I’ve always trusted the Doctor and done what he’s asked of me. And so she decided to look on while the Doctor concentrated on making his decision. While she was waiting, she had a look at the computer screen next to her. It had a number of symbols and pictures on it, all of which seemed to have something to do with the power in the basement. She recalled Mickey trying to teach her the internal workings of a computer, and an idea formed n her head. If she could somehow reprogram this to shut down the power, then no one would have to die. She got to work immediately.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Okay, I’ve made my decision,” said the Doctor. Rose looked up from her work as she heard the Doctor speak. She closed her eyes and crossed her fingers.

“You have presented me with a truly cruel choice,” said the Doctor. “Both Rose and Martha have meant a great deal to me. They have both faced many challenges with me. They have both placed all their trust in me. I have fond memories of both of them. And I have no desire to lose either of them.” He turned to Martha. “I like you Martha. You’ve been a great friend to me.” Martha smiled, but the Doctor didn’t smile back. “However … I’m sorry to say that there is nothing in this world that could force me to give up my memories of Rose.” Rose opened her mouth wide. Martha was shattered.

“I’m gonna die because of you!” she cried.

“And I’ll carry that memory for the rest of my days,” said the Doctor. “I’ll have to live every day with the knowledge of what my decision today has meant. But I’d rather remember than not remember.”

“But losing Rose caused you so much pain. You could lose it all,” temped Martha.

“True,” said the Doctor. “But I promised her I wouldn’t leave her behind. I promised her I’d remember her. And I intend to do that.” He turned to the Demintorians, while an astonished Rose watched from her hiding spot. “Rose Tyler was the best thing that ever happened to me. I can’t allow myself to give her up. She meant more to me than anything else in this universe.

And I would cross all of time and space
To have the chance to see her face
Coz when she left it was way too soon
If I could see her again I’d be over the moon”

Tears formed in Rose’s eyes at the Doctor’s words. She couldn’t take it anymore. She stepped out into view.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

And I'm afraid you'll have to wait a while for the rest. I know you're probably really pissed that the Doctor chose to have Martha die, but I had to create a situation where it was Rose or Martha, and the dream said he chose Rose.

[montypython]

Here's the rest of An Impossible Choice:

5

“Doctor,” Rose said. The Doctor stopped talking to the Demintorian, and turned around. Upon seeing her, he turned back.

“Oh that’s just harsh,” he said. Rose looked on, confused. What was he saying? “Projecting an image of Rose into the room so I can see what I’ve lost … yeah, that makes me feel a whole lot better.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said the Demintorian. The Doctor froze. If what he was seeing wasn’t part of the Demintorians’ plan, then that must mean … he turned back to Rose.

“R-Rose?” he whimpered.

“Yes Doctor,” confirmed Rose. “It’s me. I’m real.” Without saying a word, the Doctor stumbled over to where Rose was standing. He had to stare at her for a few seconds to make sure all this was really happening. He reached out and placed a hand on her cheek.

“You’re real,” he whispered. Rose nodded, a tear of happiness running down her cheek.

“My Doctor,” she said. The Doctor grinned.

“My Rose!” he exclaimed, wrapping his arms around his former companion. Rose squeezed back, realising how much she had missed the feeling of the Doctor holding her. But just then the Demintorian interrupted them.

“I don’t know what’s going on here, but it doesn’t matter,” he said. “Doctor, you have made your choice. Say goodbye to your friend!”

“No!” cried the Doctor, but the Demintorian had already pushed the button for the laser. Martha squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the beam of light to hit her heart. But it never came.

“Yes!” Rose said to herself. The Doctor turned to her.

“Did you have something to do with that?” he asked.

“Kinda,” admitted Rose cheekily. “Mickey gave me some IT tips.” The Doctor looked at her with pride.

“Our plans are ruined!” cried the Demintorian. “Doctor, you’ll pay for this! The laser might be useless, but my people can still attack using physical force.” Rose pulled the Doctor towards her.

“Doctor, you have to come with me,” she said. “I kinda programmed the laser to … um … explode. In 2 minutes.” The Doctor’s eyes widened.

“Ah,” he said. “But how will we get out?”

“The same way I got in,” Rose replied. “Grab Martha and get back over here.” The Doctor nodded, and casually strolled over to the Demintorian, secretly taking out his sonic screwdriver as he did so.

“What are you doing?” the Demintorian asked.

“Nothing, nothing,” said the Doctor innocently. “Look, an elephant!”

“Doctor, the Demintorians are a highly advanced species. We don’t fall for stupid tricks like that,” the Demintorian told him. From her spot, Rose could see that the Doctor was having no luck. Then suddenly she got an idea. It was absurd, but she had to try.

“Hey Demintorians!” she yelled. The head Demintorian and the other two looked her way. Rose kept her fingers clasped at the bottom of her T-Shirt, and pulled it up. And the Demintorians, advanced as they were, were still men, so their eyes were glued to Rose’s bare chest. The Doctor seized his chance. He ran over to Martha and used the sonic screwdriver to release her.

“Come on,” he said, taking her hand and pulling her up.

“So, that’s the famous Rose,” commented Martha.

“Yeah,” answered the Doctor.

“You chose her over me,” said Martha seriously.

“Martha, not now,” said the Doctor. “That laser’s going to explode, we’ve got to get out.” Reluctantly Martha followed the Doctor back to where Rose was standing, noting where the Doctor’s eyes were staring. Rose pulled her top back down.

“Step through here,” she instructed the others. Martha stepped forward first, but nothing happened.

“Is this some sort of joke?” she asked.

“Oh, it must be coz you’re not covered in void stuff,” said Rose. “Just hold onto the Doctor as he goes through.” Rose took the Doctor’s hand and led the way. Martha held onto the Doctor’s arm, and as she turned back to look at the basement, she saw a group of bewildered Demintorians who were finally getting the message of what was about to happen to them. The Demintorians that had confirmed her worst fear regarding the Doctor.

6

The Doctor, Martha and Rose came through into the parallel basement.

“Oh my god,” said Martha. “Where are we?”

“The exact same basement we just came from, except in a parallel universe,” explained the Doctor. “I guess travel between universes isn’t as hard as I thought.” He turned to Rose. “Oh Rose, I’m so sorry I made you think you’d never see me again.”

“That’s okay,” said Rose. “It was being separated from you that made me realise how much I need you. How much I … love you.” Martha’s eyes widened at this confession. The Doctor just stood there, a small smile creeping onto his face.

“Ditto, Rose Tyler,” he said. “About everything.”

“You mean…?” said Rose and Martha in unison.

“Look into my eyes Rose,” said the Doctor. Rose gulped and took a step towards him. She looked into his eyes, and he told her the words she’d been longing to hear for so long.

“I love you.” He then leaned down and captured her lips with his. Rose kissed him back, while Martha looked on, feeling so many feelings at once. This was just Joan all over again! Except … this time the Doctor was all there. And he’d been through so much with the girl he was now kissing. She had to face the facts – unless he was giving her a genetic transfer, that girl would never be her.

“Eh hem,” she said. The Doctor and Rose stopped, and looked her way.

“Well, now that’s all sorted…” she said, “…I’ve got some announcements of my own to make. First of all, I love the Doctor too.” Rose gasped, and the Doctor sighed.

“I know Martha,” he said. “But I don’t…”

“I know,” interrupted Martha. “I know you don’t feel the same way. I know every time you’ve taken my hand, there’s been a part of you that’s wished it was Rose’s. I know how much you’ve missed her. And now that you’ve got her back, there doesn’t seem to be a reason for me to stay. Which is why I’m going to leave.”

“Oh Martha, you don’t have to do that because of me,” said Rose. “You’ve obviously been a great friend to the Doctor, I wouldn’t want you to lose that.”

“Rose, the Doctor chose memories of you over my life,” said Martha. “And that hurt. Luckily you were there to save me, thanks for that by the way, but if I kept travelling with you guys then it’d just be the same thing over and over again. And I wouldn’t be able to handle that.” The Doctor lowered his head as he took in what Martha had said. She was right. Now that he had Rose back, he never wanted to lose her again. He didn’t know what lengths he’d go to to ensure her safety. And he certainly didn’t want Martha to feel like a shadow, or as Mickey would say, a tin dog. Perhaps it would be better for them to part ways now. It was going to happen eventually.

“Okay Martha,” he said. “Let’s take you home.”

7

They went back through to the other basement, which was now falling to pieces. They made their way through the debris in silence. For although the Doctor wanted to jump for joy from the delight of having Rose back, it would be sad to lose Martha. He cleared his throat.

“Um, does anyone know where we’re going?” he asked. “Martha and I kinda woke up here, but we don’t actually know where we are.”

“Oh, I know the way out,” replied Rose, who took the lead. The Doctor nodded.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Well, here we are,” said the Doctor as they reached the TARDIS.

“Great, see ya,” said Martha.

“What?” said the Doctor. “Martha, the least I could do is give you a lift home.”

“I don’t want it,” insisted Martha, her voice almost down to a whisper as she choked back the tears. “I just want to get this over with. I just want to get home and finish my degree, and move on.”

“Degree?” questioned Rose.

“Martha’s a medical student,” explained the Doctor.

“Oh,” said Rose. “Um, Martha, do you think you and I could have a word in the TARDIS? In private?” Martha went to shake her head, but the Doctor gave her a look that told her to do as she was asked. She sighed and followed Rose inside.

“Oh, it’s good to be home,” commented Rose as she looked around the ship.

“Well, it’s all yours now,” said Martha. “Can I go now?”

“Just … listen to me,” said Rose. “Listen, I know what a relationship with the Doctor is like. I’ve been through it all before.”

“Yeah, except yours wasn’t one-sided,” said Martha.

“Oh believe me, there were times when I didn’t know what the Doctor felt about me,” said Rose. “Like, have you heard of Madame de Pompadour?”

“Yeah, the Uncrowned Queen of France,” recalled Martha.

“Yep, and almost Uncrowned Queen of the TARDIS,” said Rose.

“What?” said Martha.

“Long story,” said Rose, sighing. “The point is, the Doctor isn’t very good at showing his feelings.”

“He seemed to show ‘em all right with you just now,” said Martha.

“But it took him time to realise that,” said Rose, getting her point across. “And when it’s just the two of you in the TARDIS, the tension can seem unbearable. But you’ve got to get through it all, coz at the end of the day, you know you wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Martha looked Rose, and thought about what she’d said. Here was a girl, younger than herself, with wisdom far beyond her years. What was more, she really seemed to understand the Doctor. There was so much she wanted to say, but all she could manage was:

“Okay.”

“Okay?” repeated Rose.

“Yeah,” replied Martha. “I mean, I understand what you’re saying. Meeting you has really opened up my eyes. Every time the Doctor mentioned you, I used to get this huge bout of jealousy. But now after meeting you, I dunno, it’s just so much clearer. About you, about him, about everything.” Rose smiled.

“Yeah, meeting a previous companion tends to do that to you,” she said. Martha cocked her head to one side. “Never mind.”

“Right,” said Martha. “Well Rose, thanks for the talk. I now know that you’re going to make the Doctor happy, and that makes me happy.”

“I’m so glad you feel that way,” said Rose. “You can still come with us if you want.”

“Nah,” said Martha. “I’ve still got a life here, I’ll be fine. But you take care of the Doctor.”

“Don’t worry, I will,” promised Rose. They then hugged, and together, opened the doors of the TARDIS. The Doctor was standing there with his arms crossed.

“Where are the claw marks?” he asked.

“Doctor, we’re adults, we know how to work things out,” said Rose. Martha nodded.

“So are you still leaving?” the Doctor asked Martha.

“Yeah,” answered Martha. “But now it will be with much better thoughts. I still don’t like that I could have died just now, but I understand why you valued memories of Rose so highly.”

“Thank you,” said the Doctor. “She’s very special to me. As were you, Martha Jones. Just in a different way.” Martha ran into the Doctor’s arms, giving him one last hug.

“I’m going to miss you,” she admitted.

“Tell you what,” said Rose. “If you ever feel the need to talk about the Doctor, look for a Sarah Jane Smith. Trust me, she’ll help you.”

“Who is she?” Martha asked.

“You’ll find out,” replied Rose. Martha nodded and turned back to the Doctor.

“Goodbye Doctor,” she said.

“Goodbye Martha,” said the Doctor, giving Martha a quick peck on the cheek. Martha blushed.

“Goodbye!” she called to Rose.

“See ya!” exclaimed Rose. Martha turned her back, and walked away from the TARDIS. She’d gotten about 20 metres when she turned back. She saw the TARDIS, and her life with the Doctor, disappearing. But it didn’t matter. The Doctor was happy, Rose was happy, and she had a new outlook on life.

“Always look on the bright side of life,” she sang as she walked down the street, a smile on her face. She may not have ended up with the Doctor, but she ended up having the time of her life.

The End

[montypython]

This one's based on dream #1:

Nerual

1

Rose’s friend Shireen was in hospital after a car accident, so the Doctor had taken Rose home to see her. He stood around uncomfortably in the waiting room, muttering about how the hospital should have a shop. Just then, Rose came back.

“How is she?” the Doctor asked.

“A little banged up, but not too bad,” said Rose. “Minor concussion, ribs a re a little bruised, and a few cuts. But hey, it could have been worse.”

“Yeah,” agreed the Doctor.

“Actually…” said Rose, “…I’d like to stay for a few days, just ‘til she gets a little better. Shireen’s my best friend, she needs me right now.”

“Oh,” said the Doctor. “I, er, guess that’s okay.”

“What’s wrong?” asked Rose.

“Well, I just don’t know how I’ll manage a few days without movement,” said the Doctor. “I’ve never been much of a sitting duck.”

“I understand,” said Rose. “Tell ya what – why don’t you go on an adventure?”

“What?” said the Doctor.

“Just take the TARDIS and go somewhere on your own,” said Rose. “Back in time, forward in time, another country, another planet … whatever.”

“Er, are you sure about this?” asked the Doctor.

“If you’re happy, I’m happy,” said Rose, smiling. “Just come back in one piece, and make sure you don’t land a year in the future.”

“Ha ha,” said the Doctor.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

So that’s how the Doctor ended up alone in the TARDIS.

“Okay old girl, what do you wanna go?” he asked his ship. The TARDIS made a series of beeps, so the Doctor checked its readings.

“Hello … what this?” he said to himself. “According to these, someone or something is messing with time. I’d better check it out.” He programmed the coordinates of the disturbance into the ship, and soon he was off. The disturbance was coming from the same year, but from a planet he’d never heard of, called Terrafin. While he was waiting, he continued to analyse the readings, but they made no sense.

“The way I see it …” he murmured, “… is that time is like a river of flowing water. But these readings suggest that something’s blocking the flow. Most of the water/time gets past the blockage, but not all of it. And when a large amount is built up … oh, I’m here.” The Doctor quickly checked that the planet could sustain life, and then he was out the door.

2

The sight before him was breathtaking. Rolling green hills, a soft pink sky, and there seemed to be a strange golden glow in the air. And just ahead of him as a beautiful young woman. Well, in reality she was only 15, but with her long flowing blue dress and her brown hair blowing in the wind, she looked like a goddess. It was all the Doctor could do to stop looking at her. He forced his eyes down, remembering the task at hand – to track down the source of this disturbance in time. He’d programmed the tracker into the sonic screwdriver, so now he switched it on. Immediately it stared buzzing.

“That was quick,” he commented. “So where is it?” He pointed the screwdriver around in front of him, trying to find the spot where the signal was clearest. He finally found it, and began walking. As he did so, he couldn’t help noticing that he was getting closer to the mysterious girl. At first he dismissed it as coincidence, but when he was less than a metre away from her the screwdriver was going crazy.

“Er, excuse me,” he said awkwardly. The girl turned towards him, and he was immediately drawn to her eyes. They were blue, not icy like his, but deep and dark.

“Yes?” she said sweetly.

“Um, hi,” said the Doctor. “I’m the Doctor.”

“I’m Nerual,” the girl said.

“Oh, nice to meet you Nerual,” the Doctor said. “Listen, this might seem like a silly question, but do you by any chance know anything about a disturbance in time?” Nerual looked at him.

“I wondered if someone would find me,” she said. “Someone who could help.”

“Help how?” asked the Doctor.

“Take my hand,” Nerual instructed. The Doctor raised an eyebrow, but did as he was told.

“You see those birds there?” said Nerual, pointing to some birds in mid-flight. “Watch.” She raised her right hand and clicked her fingers. Instantly the birds froze in mid-air. The Doctor couldn’t believe his eyes.

“You mean you can…?” he began.

“Oh nuts,” said Nerual. The Doctor looked up, and noticed that the birds were starting to move. Nerual continued to click, but the birds were moving a fraction each time. In the end she sighed gave a final click and the birds flew away.

“You can stop time,” said the Doctor.

“Yes,” said Nerual. “I’ve been able to ever since I was little. I don’t know how, I just can. But lately my powers have been deteriorating, as you observed just then. The spell will start to break, and then I have to quickly fix it.”

“A disturbance in time…” the Doctor realised. “Nerual, I think I know why your powers aren’t working. You’ve been using them all your life, and my guess is that you’ve never been able to stop all of time, just most of it. As you’ve gotten older, more time has slipped through.”

“Oh,” said Nerual. “Will I lose my powers completely?” There was something in her voice that struck the Doctor as odd. She didn’t seem overly disappointed with the news. She sounded merely inquisitive.

“I don’t know,” confessed the Doctor. “But even if you don’t, I’d suggest you stop using them, at least for a while. It isn’t your fault, but you’ve caused a great deal of damage, and the universe needs time to repair itself. If you upset the balance of time any more, the whole universe could fracture.”

“Oh my, I had no idea what I was doing would have that effect,” said Nerual. “I suppose it’s for the best that I stop using my powers. They’ve caused me nothing but trouble.”

“How’s that?” inquired the Doctor.

“It all started back on my home planet – Nagasor,” said Nerual. “My father, who was a scientist, was doing an experiment to try to increase the intelligence of snails. But the experiment went wrong. The snails grew to about 4 metres tall and 2 metres wide, with their giant brains visible from the outside. They also grew stumpy little arms. But worst of all, they became hungry for power. And the first thing they set their sights on was me.”

“How old were you?” asked the Doctor.

“I was 10 at the time,” replied Nerual. “My father tried to destroy the creatures, which we called Gegs (Giant Evil Genius Snails), but they outsmarted him every time, and ended up killing him. My mother tried tot hide me, but the Gegs created a device to track any powerful sources that could manipulate time, so they easily found me. Except the machines couldn’t cover great distances unless the power source was particularly strong. So my mother knew what she had to do. She sent me to this planet. It’s peaceful, it’s calm, it’s barely inhabited, and it’s too far away for those Gegs to ever find me. And maybe … if I do lose my powers … I can return home.” She turned to the Doctor, a complacent smile on her face. But the Doctor had gone white as a ghost.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“I’ve got to go,” said the Doctor. “Immediately.” He turned back to the TARDIS and began to run towards it, but a large silver spaceship landed in his way. The doors opened, and the hideous Gegs came out, their giant brains pulsating with evil. He heard a scream, and turned to see another ship landing near Nerual.

“Stop time!” he cried to her.

“It’s not working!” screamed Nerual frantically. “I don’t get it, how did they find me?”

“It’s my fault,” said the Doctor. “I …” He trailed off as a large Geg approached him, an alien gun in its slimy hand. It pulled the trigger, and the Doctor knew no more.

3

The Doctor woke up in a bright white room. He was strapped to a table, and Nerual was lying beside him. She began to moan as she regained consciousness.

“Gegs … all around me …” she muttered.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” said the Doctor. Nerual opened her eyes and looked at him.

“Oh Doctor, they got you too,” she said. “I’m so sorry, this is all my fault.”

“No, no it’s not,” said the Doctor. “It’s mine. I found the disturbance in time and wanted to fix it.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” said Nerual.

“Nerual, please,” said the Doctor. “I wanted to fix it, so I tracked the signal … in my time machine. That obviously increased the amount of power on this planet, and allowed the Gegs to track you. I’m so sorry.” Nerual was silent. She just stared into space.

“Nerual, please say something,” said the Doctor.

“My arm’s got pins and needles,” observed Nerual. The Doctor gave a small laugh, but then stopped.

“Seriously though Nerual,” he said. “Aren’t you mad?”

“By hiding, I was just delaying the inevitable,” answered Nerual. “If the Gegs could track me this way, they’d probably just think of another way to find me. And if I hadn’t met you, I wouldn’t have stopped using my powers. So if what you said about the universe fracturing was true, the Gegs would probably be able to track me down then.” She sighed.

“So what do you think’s going to happen to us?” the Doctor asked.

“Well, the Gegs just want our power, so they’ll probably steal your ship,” said Nerual. “As for me, they can’t extract my power, at least I don’t think they can, so my guess is that I’ll be their personal time-stopping slave for the rest of my life.”

“I can’t let them take my ship,” said the Doctor. “Rose is waiting for me.”

“Who’s Rose?” asked Nerual.

“This girl that I travel with,” replied the Doctor. “She’s supporting a friend of hers right now, so she said I could go off and have an adventure without her. Now … I may never see her again.” There was sadness in his eyes as he thought of her.

“You must really care about her,” said Nerual.

“I do,” admitted the Doctor. Just then 2 Gegs entered the room. The smaller of the two spoke.

“We have been sent here by our leader to talk to you,” it said, looking at the Doctor. “Your machine sends our meters wild. It can control time, yes?”

“Maybe,” said the Doctor.

“Our leader feels he would benefit greatly from your machine,” said the other Geg. “He wishes to know how it works.”

“Does he?” said the Doctor, an idea forming in his head. “I suppose I’d better show him then. Of course, you’d have to untie me.” The Gegs turned to each other for a moment and talked the idea over. They then turned back to the Doctor.

“Very well,” they said. They walked over to the Doctor and began untying him. When they were finally finished the Doctor added that he would also like to say goodbye to Nerual. He walked over to her, leaned down and took her hand in his.

“Stop time,” he whispered. Nerual closed he eyes and concentrated with all her might. She held out her other hand, and clicked. She opened her eyes and looked at the 2 Gegs. They were completely stiff.

“Well done!” exclaimed the Doctor. He went to let go of her hand, but Nerual stopped him.

“No!” she said. “Whatever you do, don’t let go. The last person who did so was Salimor Atkins, my best friend when I was 6 years old. In doing so, she became lost in time, stuck between the frozen and unfrozen world.”

“Oh,” said the Doctor. “Right then. Now, let’s try and untie you.”

4

The task of untying Nerual with only one hand proved exceedingly difficult. When it was finally done, they wasted no time in getting back to the TARDIS. This took a while too, partly because they had to find their way, but also because the pressure of keeping time stopped for so long was taking its toll on Nerual, whose normally flawless face was now hot and flustered. It was when they finally reached the TARDIS that the Doctor told her she could unstop time.

“Gladly,” she said, clicking her fingers. “Wow. How did I manage that?”

“Maybe you just don’t know your inner strength,” suggested the Doctor, but he doubted this was the case. After hearing what Nerual had said to him earlier, he couldn’t help wondering exactly what had happened to her while she was unconscious. “Anyway, welcome to the TARDIS.”

“She’s beautiful,” said Nerual.

“How did you know it was a she?” questioned the Doctor.

“I can feel her,” said Nerual. “Inside my mind.”

But only I’m meant to have that connection with her, the Doctor thought. How did…?”

“Both your ship and I are sources which can defy the path of time, so we share a common bond,” explained Nerual.

“Oh, right,” said the Doctor. “Okay then, I’ll just set the TARDIS to float around in the time vortex for a while. We’ll be safe there.” He busied himself pushing buttons and pulling levers.

“But then what?” asked Nerual. “With me in here, that makes me more traceable than ever! One source of time inside another.”

“Well … I could take you with me,” said the Doctor. “You could join Rose and I for adventures in time and space. I’m sure Rose would be happy to have you, as would I. Besides, having someone who can stop time would be handy to have.” Nerual shook her head.

“You’re not listening,” she said. “If I stay with you, the Gegs will be able to follow me, no matter where I go. The combined energy of me and this ship will be like a magnet.”

“Oh,” said the Doctor, scratching his head. “Um, I guess I could quickly drop you off back or forward in time, then leave. I mean, you’d have to adjust to a new life and stuff, but…”

“No,” said Nerual firmly.

“Okay,” said the Doctor, getting slightly annoyed. “Then what do you suggest?”

“The only way to end this once and for all,” replied Nerual. “Materialise in deep space.”

“Oh…kaaay,” said a confused Doctor, doing as she asked. Nerual smiled.

“Thank you,” she said.

“What are you going to do?” asked the Doctor. Nerual looked at him, her deep blue eyes staring straight into his. Without words, she communicated her message to him. The Doctor turned white.

“Oh no,” he said. “Not that.” He ran over to the TARDIS doors and stretched his arms across them.

“Please get out of the way Doctor,” Nerual said calmly.

“No Nerual,” said the Doctor. “There has to be another way. I’m not letting you do this.” Nerual sighed.

“Then you leave me no choice,” she said. “She raised her fingers and clicked. She then slowly made her way over to the doors and moved the Doctor a good distance away. She traced the pattern of the panels with her finger, knowing what she had to do. She put one hand on the door handle and clicked with the other. The Doctor looked around in confusion for a moment, then saw Nerual by the door.

“Nerual…” he began.

“Goodbye Doctor,” said Nerual, smiling. She opened the door and was instantly pulled out into the cold vacuum of space.

5

“Noooooooooooo!” screamed the Doctor, rushing over to the door. He looked out into space, and saw Nerual’s lifeless body floating through it. As he looked at her, a single tear ran down his cheek. He closed the doors, then angrily looked up at the TARDIS ceiling.

“How could you let that happen!” he cried. “Why didn’t you protect her?!”

I cannot keep someone against their will, answered the TARDIS in the Doctor’s head.

“But she was just a child!” exclaimed the Doctor.

Yes, a child with a terrible burden, a burden that no one should have to carry. From the moment she stepped in here, I felt her pain. She was lost and alone. This was the only way she could find peace. The Doctor put his head in his hands.

“This is all my fault,” he said. “If I hadn’t interfered, she’d still be alive.”

Don’t think like that, the TARDIS told him. Nerual had been depressed for a long time. She might not have looked it, but deep down inside she was hurting. She was like you, except she wasn’t strong enough to handle it. But you’ve got to be strong Doctor. Not only for yourself, but also for Rose. The TARDIS stopped, leaving the Doctor to his thoughts.

“I think I’ve had enough adventures for now,” he decided. “I’m going back to Rose.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

He could have materialised a few days after he’d left, but the Doctor decided that that would be unfair. So instead, he managed to land outside the Powell Estate 6 hours after he’d left, which was how much time had actually passed. As he got out, he saw Rose walking towards him.

“Hello you,” she said. “Land at the wrong coordinates or something?”

“Nope,” he replied truthfully. “I just decided that you were more important than a couple of days worth of saving the universe.”

“You did land at the wrong coordinates,” said Rose, laughing.

“No,” said the Doctor seriously. “Rose … I had an adventure. One adventure. An adventure that made me realise that although I’m the last of my kind, I’m lucky to have someone who’s there for me. Someone who’ll share my pain. You’re absolutely fantastic Rose Tyler, don’t you forget that.” Rose looked at the Doctor, wondering what he’d been through to come to this realisation.

“Um … thank you,” she said simply. The Doctor grinned and gave his friend a hug.

“Well, since you’re staying …” continued Rose, “… you can help with the washing up tonight.”

“Oh no, I don’t think so,” said the Doctor. Rose gave him a playful shove, and he chased her up the stairs to her flat. Sometimes, he realised, it was good to have great power at your fingertips. But it was having fun with the people you care about that made life worth living.

The End

Another happy ending. I'm on a roll here!

[montypython]

This one's based on dream #73:

A Normal Life

Susan looked at the Doctor over the central console of the TARDIS, and sighed.

“What’s wrong, my child?” asked the Doctor.

“Oh Grandfather,” said Susan. “You know I love you. And you know I love travelling with you. It’s just that sometimes I wish I could live a normal life. In a normal house. On a normal street. With normal friends.” The Doctor sighed.

“I understand Susan,” he said. “It must be hard for someone your age having to move around so much. But I want you to know that I really appreciate your company. Other than the TARDIS, you’re all I’ve got to remind me of home.” He gave Susan a squeeze. Just then, Ian and Barbara came out.

“What’s going on?” asked Ian.

“Nothing my dear boy,” said the Doctor. “We’re just having a bit of a talk.” Barbara smiled her approval, but was suddenly thrown to the side as the TARDIS lurched into action. The engines sounded loudly as the ship flew through the time vortex, before finally materialising. Everyone got up off the ground.

“Are you all right Barbara?” Ian asked.

“Fine, thank you,” said Barbara. “Susan? Doctor?”

“Fine, my dear,” assured the Doctor. “But where are we?” He switched on the scanner, which showed a nice little street and a small number of houses.

“How about that Susan,” he said, giving his granddaughter a nudge. “We seem to have materialised in an average street. What do you say we take a look at the life you were pondering?”

“Grandfather, there’s no real need,” said Susan.

“Nonsense my child!” insisted the Doctor. “One must always try to investigate such matters. Let’s find out about this area, eh?” Susan nodded, so the Doctor opened the doors, and they all wandered out.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It was a tranquil little street they’d landed in. All the houses were picture perfect, with neat little gardens.

“So exactly where are we Doctor?” asked Ian. The Doctor looked around for a moment, then gave a smile of satisfaction.

“Ramsay Street,” he declared, pointing to a street sign. “And what a lovely little place it is too.” The others nodded in agreement. They looked around, and noticed an elderly man with a noticeable double chin doing some gardening. The man looked up and, having noticed them, made his way over to them.

“Excuse me,” he said. “Where did that police box come from?”

“Hmm?” said the Doctor. “Oh, that. Er, it’s from the … council.”

“But police boxes haven’t been around for years!” exclaimed the man.

“It’s a reintroduction,” piped up Ian. “Um, exactly how long has it been since police boxes were around?”

“Well, they were in the 50s and 60s, so at least 40 years,” said the man. “But we never even had them in Australia.”

“Australia, yes, of course,” said the Doctor, finally realising where they were. “Anyway, enough talk of police boxes. Er, may I enquire your name?”

“I’m Harold Bishop,” said the man. “And you are?” Barbara stepped forward.

“This is Susan and her grandfather the Doctor,” she said. “I’m Barbara Wright, and that’s Ian Chesterton.”

“We’re Susan’s teachers,” added Ian.

“Right,” said Harold uncertainly. “And what are you all doing here?”

“Well you see my dear fellow …” began the Doctor, “…we’ve been travelling for quite a while now, and were wondering what it would be like to settle down for a while.”

“Getting a bit old for it, eh?” said Harold.

“Actually it’s me who was considering the change,” said Susan. “If Grandfather had his way we’d never stop moving.”

“Yes, it’s strange how different we are from our grandparents,” commented Harold. “Take my granddaughter Sky. She’s passionate, artistic and extremely strong-hearted. She’s also a wonderful mother, which is quite a feat for a 19-year-old. And the fact that she’s done it all while coping with the death of her baby’s uncle who she fell in love with after breaking up with the actual father is just amazing, don’t you think?” The Doctor, Susan, Ian and Barbara exchanged glances.

“Um…” began Ian, but he was luckily saved as a teenage boy and girl walked past, which caught Harold’s attention.

“Oh hello Rachel, Zeke,” he said, addressing the teens. “Where are you off to?”

“The hospital,” replied Zeke.

“Oh, anything wrong?” asked Harold.

“Katya’s landed herself in another coma,” said Rachel, rolling her eyes.

“Oh, so nothing serious then,” said Harold, which received a widening of the eyes from the Doctor. “Hey, tell me how Oliver is, will you?”

“Who’s Oliver?” asked the Doctor.

“He’s a very nice lad who’s right now recovering from donating a kidney to his father,” said Harold.

“Wow, what a noble thing to do!” exclaimed Susan.

“Absolutely,” said Harold. “Now once his father’s recovered he’ll be tried for assaulting and stalking his ex-girlfriend, Oliver’s mother.” He then turned to Rachel and Zeke. “Okay, see you kids later then.”

“See ya Harold,” said Zeke. The kids wandered off.

“Ah, they’re such nice children,” said Harold. “They’ve fit into the street so easily.”

“Why shouldn’t they have?” asked Barbara.

“Well, they live with their stepmother. Her name’s Susan too,” explained Harold. “Their father passed away on the night he and her got married. But Rachel and Zeke do have a father figure. Luckily Susan got back together with her ex-husband Karl. He used to be a doctor, then he was in a children’s band, then he was a hippie, I don’t really know what he does now … But it’s lovely that they’re back together. I was surprised that Susan forgave him for leaving her for a conniving young woman. Then for a time he went out with a politician who had a thing for nudist swimming pools. But Susan had her share of relationships in their time apart too, including one where a priest fell in love with her and he left the church for her … oh look, here she comes now.” Harold waved at the woman who was approaching them now.

“Hello Susan,” he said cheerfully.

“Hi Harold,” said Susan K (the one from Neighbours). “What’s all this?”

“Oh, the police box is from the council,” said Harold. “And this is the Doctor, Ian, Barbara, and Susan. They’re interested in settling down, and want to get to know what a normal life’s like.”

“Really?” said Susan K. “What have you been up to?”

“Travelling,” said Susan.

“Oh that’s lovely,” said Susan K. “I went to England quite recently, you know. That was where Karl and I got remarried … and where we met Karl’s ex-girlfriend and he helped deliver the child they conceived together. Isabelle was quite professional about the whole thing, you know. She even made me the baby’s godmother! Anyway … I’ve gotta get going. See you later.” She walked past the TARDIS, the paused and turned. “You know, that police box really isn’t doing it for me. I think I’ll ask Steph to raise it at the next council meeting.”

“Who’s Steph?” Ian asked Harold.

“She’s a member of this street that successfully made it into the council,” said Harold proudly. “She also used to have breast cancer, she rides a motorbike and she has a young son. She used to have a couple of stepkids too, but she broke up with their father after he went crazy and abandoned her.”

“He literally went crazy?” said Barbara.

“One of the residents, Elle Robinson, drove him to madness, I can’t actually remember why now,” said Harold. “Oh well. But you know, the Robinsons have been the cause of so much drama. For example, Paul’s son Robert posed as his twin Cameron so that he could get up to a bunch of evil doings…”

“An evil twin,” muttered Ian to Barbara.

“… and he tried to kill Paul. See, it turned out he was the cause of the plane crash that my son, daughter-in-law and other granddaughter were killed in, which makes me feel a little guilty for trying to strangle Paul after it happened … luckily he got amnesia after the removal of his brain tumour, so he can’t remember it. It’s also caused him to stop being evil, which is a pleasant change.”

“But … amnesia’s extremely rare!” exclaimed the Doctor.

“Oh no, not at all,” said Harold. “Susan and I have had it as well.” The Doctor and his companions couldn’t believe their ears. Just then the rest of the residents came out of their homes and walked up to them.

“Hi!” they all said. “Who are you?”

“Possibly new residents,” said Harold excitedly.

“Oo!” exclaimed Pepper, the ditzy blonde. “Do you want to ask us anything?”

“Isn’t life on this street unbearable with all this drama?” asked Barbara.

“Oh I don’t think so,” said Harold. “Amidst all the affairs, blackmail, murder, lying, cheating and divorce, we’re all really good friends. It’s when neighbours are there for one another that good neighbours become good friends, you know.” Behind him, various residents put their arms round one another. “And I think it’s a fair statement that our humble little street is a good representation of a normal life.” The others nodded in unison, their smiles wide. The TARDIS crew just stood their, gaping. Finally, the Doctor spoke.

“Fascinating,” he said. “Er, would you excuse us a moment?” With that he turned and took out the TARDIS key.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Hurry up Grandfather!” Susan exclaimed.

“It’s not working!” cried the Doctor. “Ian, Barbara, hold down those switches!” Ian and Barbara hastily ran around the central console and pressed the switches the Doctor had indicated. They heard a knock on the door of the TARDIS, and watched the residents on the scanner screen.

“What are you all doing in there?” asked Harold from the outside. “It must be awfully squashed.”

“Please don’t go!” pleaded Ringo, the teenage boy whose siblings all had Beatles names. “I want Susan to be my new girlfriend!” Bridget the tomboy then stepped forward.

“I’ve got a kangaroo I could show you!” she tempted. Carmella, the young woman whose father was in the mafia, ran by.

“I’m on drugs!” she exclaimed. At last, the comforting sound of the TARDIS engines drowned out the neighbours’ cries, and the TARDIS dematerialised. All the residents looked around in confusion.

“Where did they go?” wondered Frazer, who was paralysed but miraculously recovered, not unlike the amazing recovery made by Stuart, who was blind for a time.

“Oh well,” said Pepper. “Pool party at my place, even though the temperature’s only 13 degrees Celsius!” There was a cheer from the crowd.

“And then we could drink some champagne, even though there’s absolutely nothing to celebrate!” added Boyd, who’d gone from being a bodybuilder on steroids to a medical student. As they all walked off, Harold stood there, and thought to himself, “Who wouldn’t want to live here?”

The End

[montypython]

It's been a while, but I've got a new one for you. It's based on my newly discovered dream #2, but it was written as dream #113. There are a lot of different languages in this fic, and translations are at the bottom of the page:

Communication Problems

After an unfriendly encounter with the Stefanis race, the Doctor was piloting the TARDIS through the time vortex.

“So how bad’s the damage then?” Rose asked him.

“Hard to say,” replied the Doctor. “Everything seems to be in working order … oh, wait, there’s something wrong here.” He looked up at Rose. “De TARDIS vertaler is gebroken.”

“What?” said Rose. The Doctor cleared his throat and spoke more slowly.

“The TARDIS translator is broken,” he repeated. “Without it, we can’t communiceer.”

“We can’t what?” said Rose. The Doctor continued talking, but it was all Greek to Rose (in fact, the Doctor was speaking in Dutch).

“Of course,” Rose realised. “The TARDIS and the Doctor are connected. Whatever’s affecting the translator must be affecting the Doctor. Doctor, can you still understand me?”

“Oui,” said the Doctor in French.

“Okay,” said Rose. “Can you repair the TARDIS?”

“Il prendra quelque temps, mais il devrait être réparé dans un jour ou deux,” replied the Doctor. Rose put her head in her hands. She couldn’t handle this. She needed some time out.

“TARDIS, if you can hear me, please, take me to a pub,” she said. “I desperately need a drink.” The TARDIS did nothing, so Rose tried a different approach.

“Don’t make me absorb the time vortex again,” she threatened. The TARDIS sprang to life.

“Onde vamos?” asked the Doctor in Portugese. Rose didn’t respond.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

On the 16th of September 1992, the bar Cheers in Boston was, as usual, full of conversation.

“Hey guys, I need some advice,” said Sam to whoever would listen. “See, I’m goin’ out with this girl tonight and I really want to impress her. Any suggestions?”

“Plastic surgery,” called Rebecca from her office. Sam rolled his eyes.

“Punctuality,” suggested Cliff. “Chicks dig it.”

“Like you’d know,” said Norm. But Cliff waved him off.

“Now look,” he said. “I’m a mailman. People rely on me to deliver their mail every day. They trust me with that responsibility, and I prove loyal to them by delivering by the appointed time. People have great respect for mailmen.”

“I don’t,” said Carla. “Why would I respect the guy who gives me my bills?” Meanwhile, Frasier was sitting in his usual spot going through some papers when Woody served him his beer.

“What are you doing Doctor Crane?” Woody asked him.

“Oh, it’s all these schools Lillith and I have applied Frederick to,” explained Frasier. “We’re having a tough time narrowing the list down.”

“Isn’t he a little young to be going to pre-school?” asked Woody.

“Oh no Woody, this is college,” corrected Frasier. “Naturally I want him to go to Harvard like myself, but Lillith wants Yale…” Woody just smiled and nodded. He could only ever pick up about half of what Doctor Crane ever said. Just then he noticed a young blonde woman and a tall skinny man come into the bar, and the woman seemed to be in a rush. She sat down at said through deep breaths “Gimme … a pint.”

“You got it,” said Woody, pouring the beer. Rose gratefully took the beer and practically sculled it.

“Oh, I needed that,” she said, relieved. Beside her, the Doctor spoke.

“¿Puedo tener yo uno también?” he asked in Spanish.

“Don’t you start again,” Rose told him. Sam, completely forgetting the woman he was meant to be going out with, walked over to her.

“Hey honey, what’s wrong?” he asked her.

“Ingen av din forretning,” muttered the Doctor in Norwegian. Rose turned to Sam.

“See, it all started when our spaceship got attacked…” she began. Sam’s eyes widened. He could have sworn she’s only had one glass…

“… and then it affected the translator, which the Doctor is connected to. So now he’s been talking in foreign languages and I can’t understand a thing he says,” finished Rose. Sam gave her a pat on the back, wondering whether it would be to his advantage or not to bed a crazy girl. He extended his arm further around Rose, who had now taken a handful of peanuts and was beginning to eat them, when the Doctor pushed him away.

“Hinter ab, Kumpel!” he yelled at him in German.

“Doctor, stop that!” cried Rose. “Why are you doing this?” The Doctor sighed, turned to Rose, and took her hands in his.

“Weil Rose,” he said softly, “ich liebe dich.” Rose snapped her fingers.

“I know that!” she exclaimed. “That’s German! Okay, so ‘ich’ means ‘I’, ‘liebe’ means ‘love’, so that means … eww! Doctor, not while I’m eating!” The Doctor put his head in his hands. Of all the words the Germans could have picked, why did 'you' have to sound like a part of the anatomy?

“Gee sweetie, your guy here sure does know a lot of languages,” commented Sam. “How did he learn them again?”

“I told you, the TARDIS, that is, our spaceship translates them all automatically,” repeated Rose. Woody took this moment to join in.

“Sometimes I wish I had a translator for Doctor Crane,” he said, indicating Frasier. “He speaks so fast about stuff I don’t understand.”

“Oh, I know exactly what you mean,” said Rose. “The Doctor’s the same. Does Doctor Crane speak at like 90 miles an hour and then look at you like you’ve just dribbled down your shirt?”

“Yeah, but so does everyone else,” answered Woody. “Except maybe my girlfriend Kelly.”

“That’s nice,” said Rose. “So anyway, I think the Doctor can fix this translator thing but I’m not sure. Until then, I’m stuck with him changing languages every 5 seconds which is giving me a major headache.”

“Why don’t you just ask him to keep his mouth shut?” asked Woody.

“Because he’s the Doctor, and he can only achieve so many impossible tasks in one lifetime,” replied Rose.

“Эй!” said an offended Doctor in Russian. However, after some thought, he grinned. He turned to Rose and told her, “Я предполагаю, что я только должен буду найти другое использование для моего рта тогда...” Even though Rose couldn’t understand a word of what the Doctor was saying, there was something about the way he said it that seemed quite … suggestive. Rose gasped. He wasn’t. Was he? Before she could think about it any further, his lips were on hers. Rose moaned into the kiss, her tongue almost tasting all the different languages in the Doctor’s mouth. Around them, everyone looked on as the man that wouldn’t shut up and the crazy girl snogged each other senseless, until finally, gasping for breath, they broke apart. Rose looked into the Doctor’s gorgeous eyes. Suddenly language didn’t seem that important. Without speaking, she extended her hand towards him. He took it, and together, they made their way out of the bar. On the way out, Rose whispered to the Doctor a phrase she’d learnt in Year 9 Italian:

“La sua camera da letto o il mio?”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Inside, everyone exchanged glances.

Okay, what was all that about? thought Carla.

There was enough material in there for a whole seminar, decided Frasier (A/N Another Fawlty Towers reference).

I wonder if spaceships have mailboxes? wondered Cliff.

She had a good ass, observed Sam.

Maybe I should give up drinking, thought Norm.

……… thought Woody.

TRANSLATIONS

Communiceer – communicate

Oui –yes

Il prendra quelque temps, mais il devrait être réparé dans un jour ou deux – it’ll take some time, but it should be fixed in a day or two

Onde vamos? – Where are we going?

¿Puedo tener yo uno también? – Can I have one too?

Ingen av din forretning – Mind your own business

Hinter ab, Kumpel! – Back off, buddy!

Weil Rose… – because Rose…

Эй! –Hey!

Я предполагаю, что я только должен буду найти другое использование для моего рта тогда... – I guess I’ll just have to find another use for my mouth then…

La sua camera da letto o il mio? – Your bedroom or mine?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

That was quite fun to write. It's been a while since I've seen Cheers, so I hope everyone was in character.

[Sulp Niar]

[montypython]

You should have seen some of the phrases in the German phrasebook I got last year. There are a lot mentioning condoms and sex (e.g. "I won't do it without a condom") and, my personal favourite:

"Before this goes any further, I must be upfront. I'm an accountant."

A phrase any good traveller has to know.

[Sulp Niar]

Hahahahaa. That must surely replace "I've got a headache" as the best "I don't want to have sex" excuse ever.

Or, "I'm busy resonating concrete!" That's a good one, too.

[montypython]

Here's the fic I wrote for one of my recent dreams - dream #150. Warning - unbelievably shippy 10/Rose cuteness and fluff.

Frolicking

“Come onDoctor, where are we going?” asked Rose.

“Ah, that’d ruin the surprise now, wouldn’t it?” said the Doctor, grinning from ear to ear.

“Pleeeeeeeeease?” begged Rose. The Doctor sighed.

“Okay,” he said. “We’re going to Siplara Minor.”

“And what’s that?” asked Rose.

“That’s where we’re going,” said the Doctor simply. “You asked where we were going, I just told you.” Rose playfully whacked the Doctor on the arm, when the central column stopped.

“Here we are,” announced the Doctor. He extended a hand towards the door. “After you.” Rose felt that rush of adrenaline she always got when the TARDIS reached another destination. She took a deep breath and opened the doors.

Rose gasped as she stepped outside. The sight before her was beautiful. The TARDIS had landed in the middle of a wide-open field of long grass, which was waving in the breeze. The blue sky above her was tinged with a hint of violet, and the air was fresher than any air she’d ever breathed before.

“I know what you’re thinking,” said the Doctor as he joined her. “What’s the catch? Where are the monsters?”

“I wasn’t thinking that at all,” said Rose. “This place is just lovely.”

“Well anyway, I double checked, triple checked, quadruple checked all the dates and coordinates, and I can safely say that there will be no alien threats today.” He turned to Rose and smiled. “And there’s no one else here. Just you, and me…”